Since handing off my copies of my manuscript for Hunted to my beta readers yesterday I feel as though every passing minute has pounded a beat on the back of my skull in a maddening, never ending tattoo. The following is a recount of some of the thoughts that have meandered their way through my head. Some  may or may not be 100% accurate.

Tick tock, tick tock, tick tock…

It’s only been 20 minutes since I hit send. How is that even possible? It feels like a lifetime has passed.

Tick tock, tick tock, tick tock…

Okay, it’s been over 12 hours now, why hasn’t anyone written back? Why haven’t I’ve been flooded with congratulations for penning the next bestseller?

Tick tock, tick tock, tick tock…

I think I’m starting to develop a twitch in my right eye. I’m sure it’s nothing, but my cubicle neighbor keeps looking at me weird.

Tick tock, tick tock, tick tock…

Maybe their email isn’t working. I’ll send them the manuscript again, just to be sure. And copy myself on it to make sure email is working.

Tick tock, tick tock, tick tock…

Hmm. Email seems to be working fine, so why no reply?

Tick tock, tick tock, tick tock…

Okay, it’s been 13 hours since I sent them finished masterpiece. WTF?! Are they just doing this to spite me? They must be jealous of my genius. I didn’t think about how reading some an amazing piece of work might make them feel insignificant. Hope none of them feel suicidal. That must be it. They must all be too busy crying over their own failures to write back. Should send them all some tissues.

Tick tock, tick tock, tick tock…

15 hours! That should be ample time for them to come to terms with their own shortcomings and get to work on reading my novel. Why is no one responding? Why aren’t they all flocking around me, cheering my name? They should be lining up begging for my autograph and some small nugget of wisdom. How dare they besmirch me, their queen, their goddess of awesome?! Puny humans, I shall smite them. I shall strike them down and make them rue the day they ever sought to undermine my awesomeness. BEHOLD PUNY HUMANS, GAZE UPON THE FACE OF AWESOME AND QUIVER IN FEAR FOR I AM YOUR GOD!!

Tick tock, tick tock, tick tock…

Hello shiny happy people. A.J. here… hope I didn’t worry any of you with my little outburst. I feel much better now. Mr. Awesome Sauce found me some little blue pills and I feel so much better. A little sleepy. I think I’m just going to go lie down for a bit…

Tick tock, tick tock, tick tock…

Tick tock, tick, tock…

Tick tock…

Tick…

Tock…